Sunday, January 3, 2010

Sadness

My sweet friend Lhasa has crossed over.

Her presence will be so deeply missed, and my heart goes out to her friends and family.

She told me the last time I saw her that I was the first person to hear her song "Soon This Space Will be too Small." This was on her Living Road album, and was written way before she became ill. She had played it for me because to her it was about transitioning, birth and death. She called me the "baby lady". A very gentle soul, I was surprised to see her staring at me with incredible intensity after the song ended. I had drifted off into the emotions it had evoked, and felt hypnotized. Coming out of that space to see a fierce Lhasa gaze searching for authenticity in me was a shock, but I understood. She needed to know if I got it. My tears assured her I did. She got a gleam in her pixie eyes and nodded, as if acknowledging that's what she had wanted to see.

Images that pass through my mind in waves, memories I cherish: Lhasa passing by my house and popping in for a visit the 2 times in 1 year I made sushi...very happy for her, apparently :), Lhasa sitting on my bed beside me holding my newborn... telling me about her own birth...teaching my daughter vocal techniques...her laughing her head off when I ran into her on the street because I told her not to hug me because I had just found a louse in my hair from one of my kids who got it at school...our conversations about LIVING, with the time she had... Lhasa taking up chocolate eating as a healing modality...her trust in me.

The space is limitless now, Lhasa. May you be connected to the love that pours out of many hearts for you. Thank you for all the beauty you have left behind. One day we will meet again on the huge hillside.
http://www.last.fm/music/Lhasa+de+Sela/_/Soon+This+Space+Will+Be+Too+Small